Reality Phones Home

She called our church office looking for help.  Her situation was DESPERATE...on SO many levels.  Twenty-five years old, severely underemployed, the mother of a 10-month old daughter and nearly 8 months pregnant with Baby #2.  She walked away from her relationship with the children's father because he wasn't interested in sharing the responsibility of caring for his family.  He was more than content to leave it all to her.  The stress of this, combined with the stress of pregnancy, caused some health issues that impeded her ability to work (gee...yah think?).  Not being able to work made it impossible to make the rent.  So, for the past little while, she and her little one had been living in their car.  Did you catch that...nearly 8 months pregnant, with a 10-month old child....LIVING IN A CAR!  When I agreed to fill in for Miz B, I thought it was about a couple days worth of unforeseen pay and helping out a friend...hanging with my church staff (Let me just stop right here and say that I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE hanging with our ministry staff and visiting with folks who stop by during the day...LOVE IT!).  Uh, no...it was about my attitude.  That's what I get for thinking. 

TR, the front office receptionist, put in a call to our Benevolence Coordinator, who gave us the "green light" to get this woman some help...NOW!  We probably by-passed whatever protocol goes along with our Benevolence Ministry and we'll probably hear about it down the road.  Let them come.  Jesus asked me to "feed His sheep."  He didn't ask me to call the committee, then take it to the quarterly business meeting and get a majority vote!  I'm not kidding you; this was life or death.  I am not exaggerating when I say it had that sense of urgency about it.  Our instructions were to meet her at the gas station to fill up her car and then get her some lunch and wait on further instruction about where to send her.  As we hustled out the door, I asked God to fill me up with Him...so there'd be no room for me because she didn't need me...she needed to hear Him...she needed to see Him. 

She was waiting for us at the gas station and when I introduced myself, she fell into my arms...SOBBING!  She kept saying how ashamed she was for needing help, for letting things get so bad.  Thankfully, she was able to leave her daughter with a friend while she sorted all of this out, so we didn't have to deal with a frightened little one....just her frightened mama.  TR got the car filled up and while they were at the pump, I got a call from Youth Pastor, with the instructions for her to keep her 11:30 phone appointment with a particular relief agency because every other agency was full or tapped out.  Her phone appointment was probably the best bet for the moment.  We left the gas station and headed just up the street for lunch.  More praying as we went because we had no clue where the conversation would go.

I could read her emotions as plainly as the printed page of a book.  Exhaustion, confusion, sorrow, anger, desperation, hopelessness.  She was so very hungry but took the tiny, deliberate bites of someone who understood that eating too fast would just make her sick.  She was so very tired, too.  It took a great deal of concentration for her to stay engaged in the conversation and eat.  We watched her nearly nod off a couple of different times.  Have you ever seen a baby fall asleep while eating?  That's how tired she was.  She shared painful past experiences and her search for God...and the moment she found him.  She admitted being angry with God and not understanding how He could love us and watch us struggle with the trials of life.  She seemed relieved, even happy, when TR and I shared moments in our lives when we struggled with anger toward God.  Our time together came to an end and she seemed a little more hopeful than when we found her.  She promised to contact us after her phone appointment.

The rest of the afternoon's work at the office seemed inconsequential.  Finally, she called.  She wouldn't be spending that night or any other night in her car.  (Nor would she have to spend the night at my house...which she didn't know was an option...but it was...an option without right of refusal.) She would be sleeping in a bed, in a fully furnished house, without having to pay rent!!  Word of her situation had traveled the family grapevine to her parents, who live out of state.  She'd not been in contact with them for months because she was ashamed of her life's present circumstances.  The house belongs to her aunt and despite being on the market for some length of time, it had not sold.  Her aunt said she and the babies could live in the house as long as they needed to...as long as she worked to finish her degree and did right by the children.  She informed TR that she'd all but lost her faith...in everything, in everyone and then she met us.  We gave her...trust me, it wasn't us...the boost she needed.  Surely you won't be surprised when I tell you that TR and I dissolved to tears and were so very excited!

I like to think that I have a thankful heart.  I like to think that I am mindful of just how blessed, fortunate and favored my life is.  I like to think that I look at the world with God's eyes; able to see those crossing my path who are in DESPERATE need of a smile, a kind word, a hug, a meal, a ride to the doctor, a bag of groceries, a place to sleep...the good news of Christ.  I like to think that, every day, I set out to be the hands and feet of Jesus.  What I know...which is very different from what I think...is that I fall short.  I am selfish, stingy, lazy, complacent, oblivious (sometimes intentionally), fearful, hard hearted, disengaged and snobbish.  Do not defend me...you cannot read my thoughts or know what's in my heart.  Do not try to put me in my place.  Only God can do this...and He's VERY good at keeping me in line.  He uses all sorts of things to reel me back in....even a phone call.