I miss being inside: in the fold...in the know...in the mix...in the loop...in the swim. For me, this is the hardest part of moving. We've come back to a place that we called home for eight years, so many of the questions have already been answered. We didn't have to change banks, praise be! That is one more tiresome task, despite the technology that should make it a fairly easy task. We knew who would take care of our hair cuts and color (for me, not the boys). We knew which pediatrician, dentist and pharmacy we'd use. We've found our new church home. We've almost set a routine about our new life in our old but new again hometown. The completion of Outage will make that much easier. We may very well become Party Central around here! One of the most comforting things about this move was knowing that old friends were waiting for us and were glad to have us "home." I am immensely thankful for all of these things, but for the social butterfly that I am, this state of being somewhere between in and out...not totally outside looking in...not totally inside looking out is Odd.
I've probably confused some of you, so I'll offer this example. I sat between two fellow choir members, yesterday, and when one offered greeting to the other, there was that spark...that connection that comes from shared experiences and invested relationships. THAT, that is what I miss. I crave it, actually. "Hi, my name is Michelle and I am an extrovert." I do have the relationships from our previous life in SMALLtown. Again, I am so thankful for them but it has been eight years. We've grown and changed....so have other folks. Some relationships have been easily maintained during our time away...some haven't. And that's not good or bad...it just is. Some friendships require daily interaction to thrive...some can pick up, right where you left them, no matter how long it's been. In fairness to my choirmates, both greeted me and showed me kindness and made me feel welcome....but it just wasn't the same. It shouldn't be. I'm still very much the "new kid." The only cure for that is time.
And God willing, I have plenty of that.
I've probably confused some of you, so I'll offer this example. I sat between two fellow choir members, yesterday, and when one offered greeting to the other, there was that spark...that connection that comes from shared experiences and invested relationships. THAT, that is what I miss. I crave it, actually. "Hi, my name is Michelle and I am an extrovert." I do have the relationships from our previous life in SMALLtown. Again, I am so thankful for them but it has been eight years. We've grown and changed....so have other folks. Some relationships have been easily maintained during our time away...some haven't. And that's not good or bad...it just is. Some friendships require daily interaction to thrive...some can pick up, right where you left them, no matter how long it's been. In fairness to my choirmates, both greeted me and showed me kindness and made me feel welcome....but it just wasn't the same. It shouldn't be. I'm still very much the "new kid." The only cure for that is time.
And God willing, I have plenty of that.
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